highfunctioningdarklordofall:

can’t you imagine it though?

ginny’s going through a questioning phase and her older brothers keep making sex jokes so she writes in her diary “what’s a clitoris?” and tom’s on the other side like “i am a dark lord but i have a duty to this poor girl”

(via my-patronus-is-better-than-yours)

leonkumquat:

when my dad was in college he had a friend who told a girl he’d take her on a date unlike any other she’d ever been on and so he took her to the supermarket to watch the lobsters fighting in the lobster tank

they’re married now

(via thefateofmemories)

simpleflaw:

simpleflaw
joncarling:

リラックマ
me: sometimes i talk to myself
me: omg same

(Source: stranger-alert, via thefateofmemories)

oldsparky:

Second star to the rightand straight on til’ morning.Good night, Neverland.